The Joy of being Dead Tired

20170503_170822The joy of being dead tired is somewhat akin to the blessing of experiencing pain. (Chronic pain is a much different matter.) Pain is a gauge that the activity one is doing is harming you. Pain is the gauge to alert you that you need to stop to prevent further injury.

Being dead tired is a clear signal that you need to stop what you are doing. Part of being dead tired is realizing you have just put your body through a strenuous activity and have prevailed.

Inducing Physical Fatigue

I decided against attending the Good Friday service since the numerous songs would rather quickly contribute to my neural fatigue. The down side of that is having to make an early exit from the service. This always brings with it a measure of disappointment as it once again highlights one of my ABI limitations.

My alternative was to go for a leisurely bike ride. By leisurely I am referring to my pace, not the distance. I chose a route with quite a varied terrain. The route involved some hills that required me to use my lowest gear (A 15% climb in places). The reward being some great down hill stretches in which I exceeded 60 km/hr (40 mph). Though going down hill at that speed does make me a bit nervous about the risk of a spill, road rash and other possible injuries.

As the two hour mark approached I had covered over 35 km, I was longing to get home and be done. At the same time, despite my physical fatigue I was feeling great. I was still able to push on without experiencing much discomfort. The best part about physical fatigue is that it comes with a wonderful reward – a blissful night of sleep.

Reducing Neurological Fatigue

In contrast to physical fatigue, experiencing neurological fatigue is difficult. Neurological fatigue interferes with sleep. Neurological fatigue leaves me feeling at loose ends, no motivation to do anything, unable to focus and therefore often at a loss as to how to address it. I have gradually figured out that doing something physical that is repetitive and not too demanding physically and cognitively very low key is the best option.

Recently when I was experiencing neurological fatigue, I was looking for a way to help alleviate it. I was away from home, so cycling wasn’t an option. Walking was somewhat helpful but I lacked the motivation to keep going. (With cycling, it’s the bike that keeps me going, whether it’s a slower or faster pace depends partly on the terrain.) I found a quiet place to relax, read a bit and did some writing. For two days I experienced no relief. Being in an unfamiliar place interfered with recovery.

It wasn’t till the day after I got home that I began to experience recovery. I had enough initiative to do some cycling. I headed out beginning with a very relaxed pace. As I ‘listened’ to my body I was gradually feeling the neural fatigue diminish. Gradually my pace increased. The quietness of a well tuned bike (a quiet bike is a happy bike) allowed me to take in the natural sounds around me. The sounds of birds, the wind in the trees, the chatter of squirrels, the occasional bark of a dog are all soothing sounds, sounds that seem to belong. The sounds serve as an introduction to what I can expect to see as I cycle along.

After cycling an hour or two I get home feeling physically fatigued. With the neural fatigue being noticeably diminished I soon find myself napping. The bliss of a good nap, the feeling of waking up relaxed and refreshed has no equal.

The Search for Healing Sleep

Most of my life I have been blessed with the ability to be able to lay down for a nap when I needed it, even when we had a house full of young children. With ABI it’s the neural fatigue that causes serious disruption to my sleep pattern, both night sleep or a mid day nap. Neural fatigue interferes with enabling one’s brain to slow down; unable to put active functions like problem solving, creative thoughts on hold.

Bringing one’s body back into balance makes physical fatigue a real blessing. Each time I experience success with physical fatigue, the activity that bring on physical fatigue becomes a motivation for countering the next episode of neural fatigue.

Being able to trade neural fatigue for physical fatigue is a much desired conversion experience.

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Author: Jasper Hoogendam

I have been working in the field of elementary education since 1980 till my career ended due to a TBI. Renewable energy as part of 'walking lightly on this earth' has been and continues to be my interest since my teen years. Since early 2015 I have been learning to live with ABI (Acquire Brain Injury). In sharing my day to day successes and struggles, I am better able to understand how my life had changed and begin to accept the change. In sharing my experiences I'm hearing from caregivers and fellow ABI's. I'm encouraged when my experiences are helping others understand some of the complexity of living with ABI.

2 thoughts on “The Joy of being Dead Tired”

  1. Fascinating as I sit here on a Saturday night with grandkids, kids, a movie, and swirling dervishes. I’m a bit fatigued. I can’t imagine the intentional planning that goes into everyday activities! I’m glad you have physical fatigue to balance things out! Natural sounds when outside always bring a calming salve to a sometimes noisy nuerotic world for me, even without an ABI issue. Again…fascinating.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Came across a recent report that compared two groups of people. The group that spent 20 minutes a day in a natural surrounding did much better health wise; less stressed, lower blood pressure etc than the group that spent 20 minutes a day walking the streets in a city setting. I don’t think we needed a scientific study to prove that point.

      Liked by 1 person

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